autistic thoughts

here is a poem my sister wrote when she was in her tenth grade. this piece of verse has a lot of personal significance to me because being sisters i can relate to what she wrote vey easily...to the fact of having an autistic sibling, i went through the same phase she did when i was a teenager and still am and still going through the same phase of trying to understand and at the same time trying to understand my responsibilities and trying to know the difference between how i grew up and how others generally do, others who never had the experience we all had...and yes it was and still is a very rewarding experience beacuse it opened our eyes to a very different world and made us understand and believe in the creativity of the great Lord!this does not mean at all that no other person can relate to this poem it has a penetration in its simple diction that goes beyond the mere phenomena of autism...autism is a whole lifestyle a whole pattern of thoguht and that is exactly in very simple words and a 15 year old's comprehension is going to give you here:
I,yes me who's presence the world does not want to feel.
i want the world to listen to me
listen to the words i speak
donot be amazed!for i can speak
i CAN speak .
i want the world to look at me dont just pass by!
those empty looks frighten me .
i want the world to understand me
understand what i say
donot sneer i make sense
yes i make sense
just that you donot speak my words
if only i could learn your w ords or if you could understand me
may be if any one would listen , listen real close maybe just maybe !
Mariam Saleem
Copyright ©2005 Mariam Saleem